Theological Discussions with a 5-year Old

So tonight we were reading the story of Eve's temptation in the Garden, and Yikealo was very startled by the storybook's explanation that Satan had once been Lucifer, the angel of light. "WHAT? You mean Satan was a good guy once?"

When we finished the story, we were just enjoying some snuggle time when he made an announcement that led to the following conversation:

Y: "Mom, I think that if you ever meet some bad guys, then you should just pretend to be a bad guy too. Then the other bad guys won't kill you."
Me: "Hmmm...so you think that bad guys don't kill other bad guys?"
Y: "No..."(then adding uncertainly) "Do they?"
Me: "Well, they probably don't save you just because you pretend to be a bad guy too. How would you do that anyway? How would you go about pretending you were a bad guy?"
Y: "By doing this: (in a very gruff voice) I am a BAD GUY! (whispering) I serve Satan. Except the bad guys wouldn't know that you really serve God, and then they would think that you were on their side...except you wouldn't be."
Me: "But then that would be a lie, and God says that you should not lie. So you really wouldn't be serving God if you told a lie, would you?"
Y: "Well then how are you supposed to fight bad guys, for heaven sake?"
Me: "You're not supposed to fight them at all. You're supposed to love them. Jesus said that if someone hits you on one cheek, you're supposed to give them your other cheek and let them hit that one too. That's pretty hard to do, isn't it? We just need to show love to people all the time...no matter how they treat us."
Y: "WHAT? But how can you love somebody if you're already dead on the ground anyway?"

So much for my "holy" explanation of why fighting isn't a good idea! Methinks that someone has been spending way too much time as a knight this week...

Or, at the very least, this sight in my kitchen yesterday should have alerted me to his suddenly bloodthirsty leanings:

Looks rather painfully dangerous, doesn't it?